Acura World banner

1 - 1 of 1 Posts

5,777 Posts
Discussion Starter #1
Charismatic - Only one. Hands already in the air.

Roman Catholics - None. They use candles.

Pentecostals - Ten. One to change the bulb, and nine to pray against the spirit of darkness.

Presbyterians - None. God has predestined when the lights will be on and off.

Episcopalians - Eight. One to call the electrician, and seven to say how much they liked the old one better.

Mormons - Five. One man to change the bulb, and four wives to tell him how to do it.

Unitarians - We choose not to make a statement either in favor of or against the need for a light bulb. However, if in your own journey you have found that light bulbs work for you, that is fine. You are invited to write a poem or compose a modern dance about your personal relationship with your light bulb, and present it next month at our annual light bulb Sunday service, in which we will explore a number of light bulb traditions, including incandescent, fluorescent, three-way, long-life and tinted, all of which are equally valid paths to luminescence.

Baptists or Methodists- At least 15. One to change the light bulb, and two or three committees to approve the change. Oh, and also a casserole.

Lutherans - None. Lutherans don't believe in change.

Quakers - We're still waiting for someone to be moved to speak on the topic.

Jews - A committee will evaluate the gentile consultant proposals for changing the light bulb, and determine the appropriate number based on the lowest bid.

Christian Scientists - They're giving the light bulb the opportunity to heal itself through God's will, let's wait and see...

Disciples of Christ - 250 to canvass the community to come to the revival meeting to raise money to replace the light bulb.

Scientologists - one person with the overwhelming mental power and will to get the job done, as a function of higher mental power, having been freed from earlier illusions about light bulb replacement.
1 - 1 of 1 Posts